Couples and Curses
by Speedy Speck
Summary: When Reno and Tifa start dating a jealous Yuffie and Cloud place a curse on them. RenoxTifa with slight YuffiexCloud...One-Shot...Written for 'The Sacred and Profane'


Disclaimer: Final Fantasy VII does not belong to me...however much I may like it to. I own no characters, places etc. etc. so please don't sue me! I'm a nice person :)

Author's Note: This is my twenty-ninth fanfic…It's longer than I expected, but then again it also seems to short to me...oh well! And it was requested by 'The Sacred and Profane'...Hope it's good! :) PLEASE review as I really enjoy reading your views and they inspire me to get better! It would make me very very happy! Anyway stop reading this and get on with reading the fic! Hope you enjoy! :D

The brunette bartender and the red headed Turk looked at the pair in front of them with both curiosity and apprehension.

The brunette let a small, nervous smile play across her face, ''So yeah...that's it...what do you guys think?''

The ninja and the blonde both looked at the couple in front of them, their eyes were narrowed but glazed over. The silence between the four made the situation incredibility uncomfortable, and the tension in the air was unbearable.

The latter of the pair was the first to find his voice, ''So...you two...are like...together now...then...''

The little ninja looked at her friends with a rather fake smile, ''Well I'm pleased for you...'' before adding under her breath ''...not.'' She was so quiet only Cloud heard and his eyebrows raised in both surprise and amusement.

The brunette bartender fidgeted in her seat, ''So you two...are ok with this then?''

''Yeah ya don't have any...issue with me and Tifa right? You're cool?'' Reno ran a hand through his flaming red hair, obviously more relaxed than his girlfriend.

''Well, I can't say it's not a surprise, but I mean it's your choice right? Nothing I can say to stop you...'' The newly revealed couple looked at each other, it wasn't exactly what they wanted to hear, but they knew it was the best they would get out of the blonde.

Yuffie on the other hand just looked at the pair with a rather miffed expression before raising her left eyebrow, ''I want one of your Materia...''

The Turk looked at her in confusion, ''Yo, wh-'' but before he could finish the little ninja repeated herself.

''I said I want one of your Materia, the one I saw yesterday in fact...it'll help soften the blow!'' She gave them a rather soft, yet mischievous smile, before holding out her hand, waiting to receive the ball of crystallised Mako.

Tifa looked at her boyfriend opened mouthed for a few seconds before nodding her head at the little ninja, ''Erm...ok...I think it's behind the bar somewhere...'' She gingerly raised from her seat and searched around at the bar, before returning with a glowing Materia. ''There you go...so...you ok now?''

The ninja looked at the prize with hungry eyes, ''Pretty...Oh yeah, hope you two are very happy!...Well me and Cloud better be off, see ya!'' And with that Yuffie grabbed the blonde's hand and began to drag him to the door.

He attempted to struggle against her tight grip, before whispering to the ninja, ''What the hell are you doing?''

She turned her head and flashed him another mischievous grin, ''I'll tell you later...''

Once the bar door swung to a close, Tifa let out a sigh of relief, ''I'm so glad that's over... do you think they'll be all right?''

The red head wrapped an arm around his girlfriend, and pulled her close to him, ''Yo they'll be fine...and if not I'm sure they'll get over it! There's nothing they can do to ruin this...'' And with that, Reno placed a soft, but intense kiss on the brunette's pale pink lips.

* * *

Sometime later that evening Yuffie and Cloud sat in a small bar, a few streets away from Seventh Heaven. It wasn't particularly dirty, or especially clean, it was just quiet and dark. The perfect place to sit and be depressed while consuming large amounts of alcohol.

The ninja fingered her glass and let out a rather long sigh, ''Well...I sure feel...pfft...''

''Yeah me too...'' The blonde next to her downed the brownish bitter liquid in one before returning his glass to the wooden table.

''I mean...What the hell do they think they're doing? It won't work you know!''

''They looked pretty happy to me...''

''Yeah well...I bet that's just coz of the sex! That's all it's based on...I'd bet all my Materia on that...trust me...I mean come on...they don't have anything in common...'' She took another large gulp of her drink before continuing, ''You know...I'd be a way better girlfriend than her!''

Cloud raised a skeptical eyebrow, ''Oh yeah...if you're so great how come you've never had a boyfriend be-OW!''

Yuffie had slapped the blonde around the head so hard, his hair now stood up at a funny angle. Even more than normal that is. Cloud rubbed the spot where she'd landed the blow, giving a wince of pain before narrowing his eyes at the ninja.

She held up her hands in defence, ''Hey...you deserved it...being mean...stupid blonde spiky haired bimbo...''

''I am not a bimbo! And my hair is not stupid...''

''Well you are...you couldn't get Tifa...''

''Who says I wanted her?''

''Well look at you...you're all jealous coz the Turk has her!''

''Well...what about you! You couldn't even get the red head to notice you...let alone go out with you...''

''Hey! I'm the great ninja Yuffie...I all ways get my man!'' She gave him a rather devious grin.

He looked at her with curiosity, ''Oh yeah and how do you plan on getting Reno now?''

''You really are quite dense aren't you spiky...Why do you think I asked for that Materia?''

''Because you're obsessed with the stuff?''

''No idiot...well yeah I am...but I asked for that Materia specifically! And luckily for us Tifa isn't as knowledgeable about the stuff as I am!''

His face showed signs of interest, ''Oh yeah? So...what's the plan exactly?''

''Well this is a curse Materia...so I say, we curse 'em!''

Cloud furrowed his eyebrows in thought, ''I don't know Yuffie...that's a little...well for want of a better word...mean...''

Yuffie pouted at her friend before trying to reason with him, ''Stop being such a girl, spiky! Anyway it won't hurt them, just...test them...plus if their relationship can't stand a little trouble then there's really no hope for it lasting! Then if they break up, we can be there to pick up the pieces...Reno won't be able to resist me...''

The blonde let a slight chuckle escape his lips, but stopped when he saw the rather irritated look on the ninja's face. ''Ok...I'm in, so what's the curse?''

''I don't know the Materia chooses for us...it'll be a good one though...all we have to do is tell it what we want!''

She pulled the glowing ball from her pocket and held it in front of him for a few seconds before adding, ''We both have to hold it...''

''Oh right!'' Cloud placed his hand over the top, while Yuffie held it from the bottom.

''Ok here it goes...'' The ninja took a deep breath before continuing, ''Listen up Materia, I know you can see into our minds, and I know you know who we want to curse, so just make it good ok! Make it something to keep the annoyingly happy pair apart!...ok?''

A few seconds past in which the two friends looked at each other questioningly, but before either one could speak, the Mako glowed and evaporated into nothingness leaving the blonde and the ninja with their hands hovering in mid air.

Meanwhile, at the flat above Seventh Heaven, Tifa and Reno lay fast asleep in the bartender's darkened bedroom, the Turk snoring softly, while the brunette nestled her head further into the warm pillow.

If they had been awake, they no doubt would have noticed the strange white glow that surrounded them, and which then proceeded to disappear into their sleeping forms.

* * *

'Mmm...'' The red head sighed happily as he stretched his arms wide across the bed. When they didn't collide with another form he smiled to himself, _Tifa must be up...which means I don't have to get breakfast... _He would never admit it, but he'd never really got the hang of the cooker...or the cereal bowl.

Reno laid still on the bed for a good ten minutes, letting the warm sunlight slowly heat his bare skin, before he finally willed himself to get up. He looked at the bathroom door in thought, _Hm shower or no shower? _The Turk lifted his left arm and took a sniff before quickly recoiling, _Ergh!..shower it is..._

The Turk proceeded to take a long and steamy cleaning session in the bathroom, after which he pulled on some jeans and joined his girlfriend in the kitchen. When he entered she had her back to him, concentrating to the pan in front of her.

He smiled as he let his eyes admire her form, ''Yo darling, what's for breakie?''

She jumped at the Turk's sudden presence. ''Oh good morning! I'm making omelette...you like omelette right?''

''Mmmm, smells great...and I like anything you make sweetheart...'' She gave him a content grin before turning back to the cooker.

Reno attempted to approach her, and wrap his arms around her waist, but for some reason as he reached out his hands were unable to touch the young woman, no matter how many times he tried.

Luckily she was facing away from him, if she'd seen her boyfriend back off like that, she might have thought she smelled.

The red head furrowed his brow in thought before suddenly raising them and shrugging to himself. _Must be imagining things..._ As he sat down at the table, he began to drum his fingertips on the hard polished surface, trying to work out how many more days it was till he got paid.

She soon joined him, with two plates of eggy goodness. After handing him one of them, she sat down too and looked at him inquisitively.

''So...you got anything planned this weekend?''

He thought for a moment before answering her, ''...Nothing, actually...we could do something if ya want?''

Tifa paused, mostly through thought, but also because she'd just put a rather large piece of omelette into her mouth. When she finally managed to shallow the piece a blissful smile spread across her face, ''How about we have a nice relaxing evening, and watch movies? Oh and you can cook me a romantic meal...make up for the breakfast!'' she flashed him a cheeky smirk before retuning to her plate.

''Erm...sure!'' He forced a rather nervous grin before also turning his attention to the plate in front of him. _Bollocks... _If he couldn't even cook breakfast, he dreaded to think what his attempts at dinner would be like.

They both finished the remaining food quickly and as Tifa reached across to take his plate, she held her cheek to his face. ''Don't I get a kiss for the wonderful omelette hm?''

He smirked at her before attempting to press his lips to her skin. When the brunette felt nothing she turned to him in frustration, ''What's up...why didn't you kiss me? Do I have something on my face? ''

His face was just as confused as hers, ''No...I mean, I want to kiss you, I really really do...but I can't...I couldn't hug you earlier either...''

''Don't be stupid...You're just making up excuses...'' Tifa was putting on a brave face, but hurt was evident in her eyes.

The red head held up his hands in protest, ''Yo listen, why don't you try kissing me?''

''Fine!'' She launched herself at him, aiming herself at his lips, but just like Reno she found herself unable to make contact with the Turk.

Tifa eyed her boyfriend with curiosity, ''Ok... that was weird. What's going on?''

''Don't look at me darling, I ain't got a clue...''

''Why don't we try a hug? Both of us, together?''

The Turk raised his eyebrows in agreement, ''Yeah that might work...''

Over an hour later Tifa and Reno were still in the kitchen both standing less than ten centimetres away from each other and still attempting to hug.

Reno was the first to sit down in exhaustion. ''Darling, we've been trying for ages! I think we've got a problem here...''

She nodded slowly at her boyfriend, before slumping back down on her chair. ''This is just...bloody annoying!''

''Yo, totally agree with you there...but what do you suggest we do?''

The brunette paused in thought, before an idea crossed her mind, ''I'm gunna go call Yuffie, she might have some ideas...plus she might even have a Materia to help...How about you go talk to Cloud? He's smarter than he looks...''

''Well I should hope so coz he looks like an absolute moron...'' When he saw his girlfriend was not amused he sighed, ''Fine, fine I'll go talk to spiky...''

* * *

The ninja swung open her front door to find the blonde one eyeing her with suspicion.

''Well you asked, I came...what do you want?''

She flashed him her trademark cheeky grin, ''Hey spiky, did you get a call from Reno?''

He relaxed slightly as he began to realise the reason for the summons, ''Actually he came over my house, kept talking about something weird going on with him and Tifa...to be honest he wasn't really that clear...not that Reno was ever very articulate...''

The ninja let out a rather cute giggle before moving aside and ushering Cloud into her house. Soon the pair were both sat on the sofa in her rather brightly coloured living room.

''So...I'm guessing you got a call from Tifa then?''

''Uh huh! She was wailing on about how her and the Turk couldn't touch any more!''

''How do you mean...not touch?''

''I mean they can't touch...no holding hands... no hugging... no kissing...and definitely no sex!''

The blonde looked a the rather satisfied grin on the ninja's face with slight confusion, ''And that's...good?''

''Hell yeah! It's even better than I imagined... I would never have thought of a curse like that...clever Materia...'' Yuffie sighed blissfully, much to Cloud's amusement _What is it with her and Materia...she's worse than Cid and airships... _But he was snapped out of his musings when the ninja continued, ''They won't be together for long! Now they're gunna realise they have nothing in common and can't hold a decent conversation!''

''So...what did you tell her exactly, when she called you I mean?''

''I told her just to wait it out, and I'd 'look' out for a Materia to help cure them...And would you believe it, she bought it hook line and sinker!''

Cloud smiled at her rather unconvincingly before airing his views, ''Listen Yuffie...don't you think maybe we should just help them?''

''No! And besides we can't...there's nothing we can do to break the curse now...only Tifa and Reno can. And before you ask, I don't know how they can...they'll have to figure that out themselves! And another thing, I don't care how gutless you are, but I refuse to give in! I'm the only single female I know and I'm sick off it!''

Even though the ninja clearly had anger in her eyes, the blonde could swear he saw a tear trickle down her cheek.

* * *

It was late evening now and the couple stood in the kitchen looking at Reno's attempt at curry.

''Well...it looks...interesting!'' Tifa tried to make her voice sound convincing, but the apprehension was evident.

The red head gave it a small poke with the wooden spoon, ''Yo...it's probably fine...I mean-'' but he was cut of by a very scared sounding Tifa.

''Reno...sweetie...why is it moving?...''

They pair almost simultaneously jumped back from the pan.

The Turk looked at his girlfriend wide eyed with both fear and slight amusement , ''Takeaway?''

She sighed, letting a small smile creep across her lips, ''Takeaway...''

A few hours later, Tifa was sat on the sofa, waiting for her boyfriend to return. He had agreed to clear up, after the disaster he made of dinner. Tifa didn't mind that much though, she rather enjoyed the takeaway, even if she knew it was ridiculously unhealthy.

When the red head returned he gave his girlfriend a half smile and gracefully placed himself next to the brunette. He reached out and tried to put at arm around her, but when his attempts proved fruitless he growled in frustration and exasperation.

Tifa looked at the distressed Turk, desperate to reach out and comfort him, but unable to. So instead she decided to cheer him up through other means, ''I know this is...well I know this isn't fun for you...But we can still enjoy ourselves!'' The red head eyed his girlfriend with both suspicion and apprehension.

Within two hours, the Turk had laughed more than he'd done so in the past five years. His girlfriend indeed had a talent for making the best of a bad situation. The brunette had gotten out a variety of board games and had proceeded to lose miserably at every single one. He had a suspicion she may have done so on purpose, but either way he found it strangely endearing. Not that either really knew, but in the space of that evening they grew closer than they had done in the entire time they had been dating.

But like most good things, it didn't last. In the space of three minutes the entire evening turned into something you'd see on a bad soap opera.

After Tifa finished packing one of the games neatly back in it's box she turned to the young Turk, ''So you gunna stay over tonight then?''

He paused in thought for a moment before giving her the worst answer he could, ''...is there any point?''

Tifa raised an eyebrow, ''Of course...''

''Well, I mean, we can't...you know...so I just-''

''What, you just assumed they'd be no point! You don't wanna spend time with me...you just want my body! Yuffie was right, this is never gunna work! She told me that this 'thing' was probably a sign, and she was bloody right! You know... I thought we'd had a really good time tonight-''

The red head finally managed to get a word in, ''We have!''

''Well you've just ruined it! The brunette jumped up from the sofa, grabbing her coat from the hook on the wall, and before Reno could even utter a word in his defence, the front door closed with an almighty slam. _Well done Reno...well done..._

The young woman shivered slightly as the cold air hit her face, and her hair blew behind her like a wild animal.

_Oh Tifa you idiot...he's a guy...they all ways say stupid things...you didn't even hear him out..._

She was rapidly beginning to regret leaving the warmth of her house. The clouds above Edge were opening and sharp, damp pellets shot down and bounced furiously of her pale skin.

It wasn't long before Tifa realised she was quite lost. The rain made everything seem hazy and she'd been so wrapped up in her thoughts she hadn't been paying attention to her path.

She grew more and more irritated with every step she took, not knowing which street was which, and the water that was slowly soaking her through didn't help. After walking around for a few more minutes the brunette noticed some builders, working on a repair in someone's roof, a few houses down.

_Hm...maybe they can help...couldn't hurt to ask..._

As she approached, she called up to them, but a howl of wind blocked her voice from ever reaching the working men.

Much to her surprise, it was their voices she heard calling down to her.

''Hey you down below! Move it! Now!''

But before she could even process the words she felt something shockingly hard hit her skull with a mighty force. As she reached her hand up to her throbbing head, she noticed her fingertips were covered in blood.

One of the builders had come down now and was talking to her, but to the young woman, his voice sounded funny, and soon his face was blurred. She tried with all her might to focus her eyes, but soon she could no longer hold them open and then all she knew was darkness.

* * *

The ninja looked through the glass pane, separating her from the ward. Her eyes unmoving, just staring at the woman laying in the bed a few metres away from her.

Her attention didn't even shift when her blonde friend came running up to her.

''What's going on? I got a call, something about an accid-'' He stopped when he saw the look on Yuffie's young face. He'd never seen her like that, it was a mixture of both fear and regret and she seemed to be using all her energy's to stop her bottom lip from trembling.

He put a comforting hand on her shoulder before trying again, ''Yuffie...''

This time she actually turned to him, wide eyed and empty. ''Hey Cloud.''

''What happened?''

''It's Tifa...she had a knock on the head, something to do with some construction work...she'll be ok, but she won't be up for a while. Reno's with her now...''

Cloud's brow furrowed in confusion, ''...Well that's good though right? I mean that she's gunna be ok?''

''Yeah but...she could have...they fought because of my curse...this is all my fault...'' The ninja's voice was shaky and the blonde could tell she was on the edge of tears.

''You couldn't have known she'd get hurt...''

''But...I...'' Her voice failed her as hot tears prickled down her cheek.

The blonde decided words would be of no use here, so instead he wrapped his arms around the young ninja and pulled her close to his chest, gently stroking her hair, until her breath began to steady.

The Turk looked down at his girlfriend lying still on the hospital bed, ''Tifa...''

Her form seemed so small and fragile, even though he knew she could best him in a fight any day. But as she lay motionless, her chest rising slowly, but steadily and her face paler than usual, a strange sensation rippled inside the red head.

He reached out his hand, longing to stroke her hair, and touch her face. The red head was so desperate, even though he knew he couldn't reach her, that his hand trembled and before he could stop them, clear cold tears fell from his eyes and hit the bed below.

For once in his life, Reno couldn't hide his emotions. His mind was buzzing with so many things he wanted to say to her, he was no longer able to hold them in. ''Tifa...I know I act like an idiot...and that I don't all ways say the right thing...but...I want to be with you...forever. Even if I could never touch you...I won't leave you...not ever...because I love you...I love you Tifa Lockhart.''

And without thinking about it he bent down and placed a soft kiss on the brunettes pale pink lips. After he pulled away it took him a few seconds to realise what had just happened. Though he didn't have long to wonder about it, as his girlfriend's eyelids began to flicker and her deep crimson eyes were soon staring into Reno's aquamarine's.

Her voice was quite but strong, ''Reno...''

''Tif! I, I just kissed you!''

''Excuse me?'' Her head was muggy and she wasn't really sure what the red head was going on about.

''I kissed you...I mean before you woke up, and by the way what do you think you're doing walking under scaffolding! You know that's never a good idea! But that doesn't matter now...we...we can touch again! ''

There was a moment of silence as the dazed brunette tried to process his ramble, and then a teasing smirk flashed across her face, ''Well then...how about you prove it to me...''

Meanwhile on the other side of the glass...

''Did...did you see that...they kissed! They broke the curse. I guess they really were meant to be together...'' The ninja's voice was somewhat bitter sweet.

''Hm.''

''Looks like we're both gunna be the last single one's left...'' She let out a slightly disappointed sigh.

The blonde paused for a moment in thought before turning to Yuffie, ''Do...do you wanna go out sometime?''

Yuffie looked at her friend inquisitively for a few seconds before a cheerful smile spread across her face, ''Yeah ok.''

* * *

A/N=Maybe a little bit 'sleeping beauty' at the end there? I hadn't really intended on making Cloud and Yuffie get together...but I couldn't resist...


End file.
